From here to there, funny things are everywhere

Goodness people, it has been a week. I honestly can’t believe that summer school is over (last Thursday–it was bittersweet) and that now all I’m doing with my life is nannying. I feel like I should relish in the idea of having some free time, but as we all know, I like my life to be filled to the brim. Anyway, Sunday I went to see Shakespeare in the Park with my aunt; last year was our first year going so clearly we were professionals this year. How does one become a professional in watching outdoor theatre, Meagan? I’m just so glad you asked! Basically it meant that we rented those goofy little lawn chairs instead on sitting on the ground and snacked on wine, grapes, cheese, carrots, hummus and crackers; clearly we were high balling. It was a fabulous time, and a tradition that I hope we continue.

Much Ado about Nothing set :)

Monday-Wednesday I got my baby fix; seriously y’all, she is just too much. We discovered that baby girl hates when you blow in her face, she actually tenses up, sticks her tongue out and stiffens her body into a little ‘T’ shape; it’s hysterical and she giggles and will unfreeze as soon as you stop. Then I had my first full day off on Thursday. It was a super legitimate day off, the ‘I sat in my PJs and watched NCIS and then eventually went to the gym’ kind of day. It was truly lovely…however I hope I don’t have too many more days like that as they get a little redundant.

She was so shocked when I flipped the camera a nd she could see herself

This gets us to yesterday and today. Seeing as how it was Friday and I didn’t have anything super huge planned, I went on a minor shopping spree bcaaaaaaaaaaaaause–wait for it–I am one full percentage down on body fat and BMI! Clearly this was cause for celebration hence the new skirt, shirt, swim suit and face scrubber (really that was more in support of a friend, but still an excellent purchase). I also went to the gym– of course– BUT I also went out last night. I can sense your disappointment after a bolded, italicized and all caps word, however I’m not finished. Where did I go, you ask. Well, I went out to the local gayborhood! *note, that’s how it was presented to me, it is by no means a slur or meant to be offensive* My goodness, I had the absolute best, best time. There was fantastic people watching to pair with phenomenal company; I really couldn’t have asked for a better Friday night. I also went to my first drag show and one of the ladies (I wish I could remember her name, she was fantastic) complimented my purse, tried to pilfer said purse, and then told me I was super pretty a few times…let’s face it, those ladies know a thing or two about how to dress up and look nice (some more successfully than others) but I’ll take that compliment, proudly. Anyway, I think I’m going to Austin in a weekend or so to see my friend’s show; he’s rapidly becoming one of my favorite people and I am just thrilled beyond belief that we’re hanging out outside of Zumba. Y’all know how I get about people who I feel predestined to be friends with, he was one that I just knew would make an excellent friend and I have not been wrong, yahtzee.

Friday selfie? Well, ok.

Now it’s time for me to kick it into gear because in less than an hour we are leaving for a girl’s weekend by the lake and hot springs. I’m hoping for an amazing time, but I feel as though interesting might end up being a better descriptor, regardless, I’ll fill you all in when I get back. I’m going to leave you with this thought that I had yesterday: “Try something new everyday. It doesn’t have to be huge or groundbreaking, but life is too short and full of fabulous things that it seems silly not to experience something new daily.” These are words I’m trying hard to live by because I don’t to have those ‘man, I wish I had done that’ moments, so take them or leave them, either way, you’ve already read them ;-)

Currently Reading: facebook

Currently listening to: Little Black Dress by Sara Bareilles

Hello, stranger

Well hello all!

It’s been quite some time since my last update; I would love to be able to tell you all that I’ve had a good reason for not blogging, but in all reality, I don’t. It honestly just fell by the wayside, but I’m back and I’ll try to do weekly updates (because daily updates weren’t realistic). You’ll notice some changes to my page, mostly that the scale and measurements are now gone, as is the countdown. This isn’t because I’ve fallen off the wagon or even because I’m ashamed, really it’s because after much soul-searching I’ve decided that those things don’t matter. I don’t need a time frame to cause me to stress out about reaching a certain point, slow and steady is what matters; it’s a life change and that kind of change takes time. The scale will forever be an enemy of mine if I continue to give it power in my life. So, instead of looking for a magical number on there, I’m more focused on working out, toning up, lowering my BMI and, as they say, ‘looking good nekked;-) Sorry if that is cause for disappointment, but I’m more at peace working this way. On that note, things are going well, I feel better, apparently look better and have found a deep, deep love for Zumba. It’s really almost an obsession, but it keeps me grounded and helps relieve some of the stress that comes with living in the world that I live in. I actually want to get my instructor license, but I’m holding off for a year so that I can continue to go to classes and grow as a participant before taking to plunge. If you haven’t tried it, I would highly recommend it :)

Constant dance party, check!

In other news, the first year of teaching is over! I survived! I can’t say I loved every minute, I didn’t, but on the whole I had a wonderful year and am excited for round two happening this fall. I’m in a pretty good position in my district, I’ve become a ‘go-to’ person for my realm of special ed, which is pretty awesome and I got to work with my favorite population of students this summer (ED and AU for those of you who don’t know). Yes, I am the crazy teacher who didn’t take summer off, but working Extended School Year (ESY) was an amazing opportunity and I quite enjoyed myself. On days when I wasn’t teaching, I was blessed to get a job as a nanny for a sweet little girl; she’s a little over four months old and precious beyond belief. It’s been a busy summer, but let’s be real, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Seriously, look at this awesome kid.

I honestly don’t know what else to update you all on…much has happened, it just seems like if I wrote it all out, this post would be forever long and I don’t have time for that, seeing as how I have to be at work in a little over 20 minutes. I guess we’ll just start from this point and I’ll keep you updated from here, savvy? I will leave you with a picture of progress, because I think it’s important to see hard work pay off. I am by no means finished working on myself, but it’s nice to know that I am different, both physically and mentally. I’m in a good place, guys, and it is great to be back in the blogging world.

Five years ago, these damn pants were too tight, good thing they loosened up ;-)

Currently listening to: the sound of my puppy snoring and the fan

Currently reading: Jesus Calling (it’s a pretty good devotional, if you happen to be looking for one)

Of Deep Space, Surgeries, Friendships and Mentalities

So I’m either a week late and a day early; really I’m both but you know that’s the way things crumble sometimes. Life has been super crazy and I’ve got a few things on my mind so a fair warning, this might be a lengthy post (granted it might shorten down as I write it, one never can tell). On the school front, things are progressing the same: one of my students will be homebound until the end of flu season, one still cannot use the lift system, one had a birthday–that was the best time, I mean he was vibrating he was so excited, it totally made my week, and one still has internal problems that the doctors can’t seem to figure out. My little room with my special friends continues to trudge along, we are fighters in there. We have also gone into space for the next two six weeks and there is no curriculum for that so guess who gets to be lucky curriculum creator–this girl, woo! (Totally sarcastic right there, I mean I have no idea how to create a curriculum, it’s just going to be an adventure I suppose) The ARD season continues for me, which is stressful but for some crazy reason PTA keeps bringing goodies up to school so this whole no carb thing has just failed miserably–I have got to work on some self-control, but sopapilla cheesecake is just so stinkin’ good.

It’s my deep space wall, I do love making the room reflect the unit themes

In other news, mom had her surgery to remove the cancerous mass yesterday, while they were in there they also checked her lymph nodes and luckily the cancer was contained to the mass. I cannot tell you how relieved I was to hear that, I mean now she has some radiation to go to but they’re pretty confident that she will be in remission soon. She was talking in circles yesterday after surgery and kept rambling; I died I was laughing so hard. That’s a huge weight lifted, it’s also an eating trigger destroyed, thank goodness.

No cancer in the lymph nodes and my hair goes into a high pony, double win.

Over the last two weeks, I’ve just been struck by the word friendship. While reflecting on it, I realize that at any one moment I have 4 people who know exactly what is going on in my life..one of those 4 is my sister. Don’t get me wrong (I can sense you all thinking, “where is she going with this”), I have many friends but really only 4 best friends. I took a moment this week to think about how my friendships looked and really, I know more about my friends than they do about me. I don’t know if this means that I am surrounded by self-centered people or if I’m just guarded–I’m inclined to think it is a mixture of both, but I was struck at the imbalance. Now, that being said, I know that in the swings of friendship there are times that one friend is more needy and such and with my fab 4 as I’ll now call them, we have that balance I think, but with everyone else it is like an imbalanced see-saw. I mean people who read my blog may know more than some of my friends who claim to be my best friends; interesting is it not? I don’t want this to be read as a slam, it was just something that I was thinking over; at one time this imbalance would have upset me but now I find myself at ease with it. Perhaps I’m becoming older and wiser, or I just rest in the knowledge that I do have my fab 4.

Right so the last thing that has been rattling around my mind this week was the sole purpose of this year. You know, I’ve gotten so tied up in the scale and the numbers that it’s showing, that I’ve forgotten why I even did this in the first place. This year was to be fit, to get my shit together so that I can be a healthier human being. Being fit doesn’t mean weighing 155 pounds, it could mean wearing a size 8 but being able to run a marathon with no problems, or compete competitively in a tough mudder. I think I lost sight of this, I mean I’ve been beating myself up about how fast/slow things are happening on the scale front that I’ve made myself miserable. I tried to cut carbs completely for goodness sake, that’s not healthy, it also made me a total bitch and made me feel like I needed to fling myself into a ditch if I so much as looked at a dessert. Dammit, if I want a piece of cheesecake I can have it–or part of it–I just can’t have it everyday. My mind is back in the right place and I will hence be focusing on being healthier, eating cleaner but not mentally abusing myself if I have a slip.

This, always this.

Here’s to a new week and new attitude and a completely thankful heart for the wonderful things and people in my life currently, see you folks next week (be ready for a Black Friday post ;) )

Song of the Day: Love Like Woe by the Ready Set
Day: 135
Days Remaining: 230

Currently Reading: space-y science material

Trick or treat? Well, it’s never a treat so…

I have this intense love/hate relationship with Halloween. On the one hand, I love that it frees people up to embrace their inner weirdo and gives an opportunity for people to have a boost in confidence; I mean if no one knows who you are, you can dress up and be whoever you want for one night. However, with Halloween comes candy…I happen to adore, adore candy (not all kinds mind you, but many are on the “nomnom yes” list), which, when one is trying to lose weight is quite difficult. If everything had gone smoothly this week, I think I could have resisted temptation. But when do things ever cooperate? Answer: never. So I caved–not just a little caving–I mean full-out candy monster, I was in ‘where-candy-goes-to-die’ mode. Unsurprisingly, the scale reflected this and I am now 7 pounds away from my sunglasses, *insert wicked sad face*, that’s karma though I suppose…and also a fantastic reminder that I can’t just jump ship whenever I feel like it.

Yeah, feel sorry for the candy

So perhaps you would like some background into why this week was so ridiculous, well let’s start on Tuesday shall we? (I mean you have the vlog post from Monday, amusing and ridiculous as it was) Right, so Tuesday was spend getting paperwork together for my first ever ARD and doing some last-minute assessments that I may or may not have forgotten to get done prior to this…really, they were done just not documented. Tuesday we also found out that the five other spots that they found on mom were noncancerous, which is a HUGE relief, but the insurance is still digging their heels in on this whole genetics test business…stupid tightwads over in insurance. Wednesday came, and I was up bright and early, I mean it’s better to be early than late in these instances. We get through the ARD and things are running smoothly, so smoothly that I started to become suspicious; I shouldn’t but this particular mother has been a thorn in my side since day one–she’s the one who called that lovely district meeting within the first week of school. Turns out I was right to be suspicious because as we are reading over the minutes and getting ready to conclude the meeting, she throws in this curve ball: she no longer wants her child to be put in the lift system at school, she wants manual lifts only. **A quick note: I have four friends who I position 5-6 times a day, they range in weight from 62-120 pounds, imagine lifting them physically, we would all be out on disability within 2 six weeks…which is why we have the lift system.** Well, at this point, it’s not like we can rebut this because the PT for the district had left so we signed the new IEP and immediately, my student became manual lift only. This decision still steams me, but you know, when I verbally express my concern at this decision and you still choose to push it, well there’s not much that can be done. My room then became this tense war zone because one of my assistants was just so appalled by this decision (because we are not trained on manual lifts, we cannot move this student, which will be the case for the foreseeable future as no one is able to come out and train us); and though I explained that this was a legal binding document and the consequences were presented to the parent, my para went on a war rage trying to “fix” it. *sigh* I am still warring with this woman, because she frequently forgets that I am the teacher of the room and she does in effect, work for me. While I welcome discussion and ideas, once I have weighed things, what I say goes and she shouldn’t constantly be looking to go above me. Now my room is stuck in a state of awkward tension; it annoys me.

This, I feel like this.

Luckily, Wednesday night I got to see super cute trick or treaters and gave away all of the candy I hadn’t already devoured. The rest of the week passed without too much excitement, I mean Wednesday did kind of steal the thunder from the rest of the week. Though, Saturday I did go to a craft show with one of my best friends and then we went out to dinner with our other sweet friends; it was a much-needed girls night complete with P.F. Chang’s (holy nom Batman) ice cream and Pitch Perfect–you should really see that movie, it’s fantastic. Looking at how the week went, I’m actually really happy that I’m only up a pound and a half, it really could have been worse. Also, we have bridesmaid dress shopping in three weeks; so for three weeks I am going in beast mode, for real this time, because I don’t want to be the biggest girl on this shopping spree and damn it, I won’t be. So goodbye carbs until the 24th, which sucks because Thanksgiving is totally before our dress shopping extravaganza, oh well, sometimes sacrifices must be made.

I might be posting more than normal because I love carbs and might need that outlet lest I go crazy, so until my next post,

Song of the Day: When I’m Gone by Lulu and the Lampshades (now they’re the Landshapes, if anyone was wondering)
Day: 122
Days Remaining: 243

Currently Reading: I’m searching for 7th grade science books about space, suggestions are welcome :)

Good lord, who let me vlog?

Right, so there it is, a vlog post. You have all been warned that it is rambly and possibly ridiculous but in my defense it is late and really, you just have to be super with it to vlog…I’m just happy that it seems slightly coherent. Honestly, it’s so quick to get done that they might be making monthly appearances; don’t quote me on that it, it’s just an idea that I’m tossing around.

Anyway, happy week people, see you all again on Sunday.

Song of the Day: Thriller by Michael Jackson (in honor of Halloween and all)
Day: 116
Days Remaining: 249

Currently Reading: State assessment rules and regs (yes, I am the party animal, woot, woot)

If only I could vlog…

Right, so things have been on this wild and crazy rollercoaster recently, to fill you guys in on why I’ve been so MIA and falling off the wagon and such…we found out last week that my mom has breast cancer. This week they put it between stages 1-2, which is good; it’s really good actually. I’m not going to lie, I’m more than a little freaked out by this, 1)it’s my mom, she’s never supposed to be sick or anything and 2)my grandma had it—beat it but had it nevertheless, so I think that odds are higher for my sister and myself to get it. They ran the test today to see if it was passed on genetically and we won’t know those results until tomorrow or the next day. I’m not telling you guys to get sympathy slack for not blogging or for validation for cheating on the diet; this was more so that you could understand why blogging was taking a backseat. I’ve decided (well really it was decided when by best friend was diagnosed) cancer is just a giant bitch.

Ain’t that the truth?

Anyway, I’m back. Back to blogging, back to running, back to gym-ing it up and back to healthy eating. I updated my measurement and wouldn’t you know, after cheating my chest was the first thing to grow…you can’t see it but I’m rolling my eye here. The scale went down though, which is always a good thing, in fact, it was lower than it was precheat, wooo! This lady is 6.4 pounds away from some Ray Bans. I know I said I was going to get a ring, BUT I thought about it, and I would have to get that resized, which is a complete pain in the butt so when I hit 190 I’ll get me a ring…not a pound before then.

I will own you, or something related to you

Now, on the boot camp front…I did it the first day and I’m sad to say that I haven’t done it since. I went to the gym but I stopped boot camp. No worries though, I want to do it and I think I’ve reworked my schedule so that I can get it in now :) Scheduling is always my issue, as can be seen by my sporadic blog posting. I also got a new heart rate monitor, it’s not as fancy as the bodybugg, but it’s pretty nice; I mean it tells on the watch part my calorie burnage. Since getting it, I’ve decided that I will be striving to burn 1000 calories every workout. I’m only eating around 1500 so I think this works out perfectly, yay sweating!

Ta-da!

I’m toying around with the idea of a vlog next week, I mean I don’t know that I’m super exciting or that I’ll do it well, but maybe it will be faster that sitting down to write. That you would all get to see my bright, shining face is a plus ;) To sum up for the week, school is school and is slowly killing me (no I didn’t write anything about it this week), cancer sucks, boot camp is being restarted, calorie counters are the bees knees and I might do a vlog. I hope you all have a fantastic week and I will see you Sunday :)–for real this time.

Song of the Day: Not Ready to Make Nice by the Dixie Chicks
Day: 109
Days Remaining: 256

Currently Reading: political party platforms–it’s voting season you know.

Right, so I up and disappeared for a hot minute…

Where to begin? To start, the state fair was fantastic, granted we totally got drenched while being there…apparently that light rain was actually a steady drizzle all freaking day. It was still a good time and I got to see my seester, which is always a HUGE plus for me :) Here’s a picture of the fried foods that we all shared (see, shared, I did not eat them all by myself)

So much fried fantasticness

Let’s see, after the state fair I realized that we were coming up on the end of the 1st six weeks of school. Here’s a fun fact, if you wait until the day before grades are due, you actually go crazy. I actually don’t know how I lived through that week, thinking back on it, it’s kind of a strange haze. It was a week from hell, this much I know, but it ended with a road trip to see my best friends and of course my seester…so I suppose I shouldn’t complain too much.

                           

Right, so that gets us up to this past week. There are things happening with my family right now, they aren’t super detailed yet so I’m not really going to talk about it…I’m a detail person so when I don’t have them all I start feeling anxious, however Wednesday I should know more. Last night I went out because this was a long week and really I just needed to blow off some steam, clearly the weather took that seriously and we got caught running back to the car in a monsoon, seriously, what’s up with me and the rain?

Ridiculous

And now onto the weight loss portion of our entry..(really this has been a short post, I thought I was going to go into this long vivid explanation, but when I started writing, this is what happened). Anyway, the week of the fair I worked out twice, then at the end of the six weeks I did nothing, literally, nothing BUT this past week I went everyday except today, though today is still young, and Wednesday…holla, gettin’ that groove back. I also went up a pound, not terribly shocking I mean no working out and eating like a crazy person, I’m actually shocked it’s not more. I haven’t measured, I could do it right now, but I’m sitting outside in a hammock swing so that will just be updated next week. With everything that’s been happening, keeping up with this hasn’t been a huge priority, however I am going to try to be better about it because this is an important part of the journey. Anyway, I have paperwork to get done and goals to write so this will be it for the week.  But before I forget, I’m starting a six-week boot camp, it’s at home, but I’ll let you guys know how week one goes on Sunday. :)

Song of the Day: Why Makes Perfect Sense by Wade Bowen
Day: 101 (seriously, I need to get it together)
Days Remaining: 264

Currently Reading: IEP goals and objectives